The Crimson Tide
by aliasfan
Summary: [ONESHOT][Sora's POV]I glanced over to the window. It would be so much easier to end it with a jump. It'd go by quick and painless. But pain was what I was looking for...


==**The Crimson Tide**==  
==**A one-shot by aliasfan**==  
  
==**Sora's POV**==  
  
_Don't underestimate what goes on behind closed doors..._  
  
I decided to do it right after dinner. My parents would sit in the living room, turn the t.v. up loud, and relax. They wouldn't think twice about me going to my room. My mom would say, "Our little boy is doing his homework. I'm so proud!"  
  
Yah right..._homework_.  
  
I climbed the stairs slowly, taking in each step. _My last steps_. As I walked, I could feel the sharp kitchen knife in my pocket. Obviously I didn't hesitate to clear my place this time. Slipping the knife in was easy.  
  
As I reached my bedroom door, I glanced over to the window. It would be so much easier to just end it with a jump. I'd waste no time at all. It'd go by quick and painless.  
  
_But pain was what I was looking for._  
  
I could hear laughter coming from downstairs. I surprised myself by smiling. Why was I smiling? Was it because I knew that they were happy and having fun? Or was I smiling because their joyous moment was at the same time as my end? That they'd be laughing, unaware that at the same time their "precious little son" was killing himself?  
  
I brushed those thoughts away as I brought my attention to my bedroom door. I pushed it gently, letting it creak as it opened. _Take in every last sound_. I walked in, slowly putting the knife on my dresser. I had almost forgotten to close the door, so I did so, locking it just to be safe. I went back to my dresser, picking up a picture, its frame smooth and cold. _Take in every last touch_. My most treasured picture. I had taken it that one Saturday morning by the beach. She was there, sitting on a colorful towel and talking with her friends. I took the picture at the exact moment she was laughing. Her smile...it's so intriguing. Her eyes...so blue and beautiful. _Take in every last sight_. Even her smile could keep me from doing this to myself, but I know that a smile from her would never be directed to me. I wonder if she knows I even exist? _Kairi_...I took one last look at the girl I never had...and never will.  
  
No time to wait, I must do it now. I grabbed the knife off of my dresser. Funny, I thought. Just a month ago I had no idea that the knife I was using to cut my steak for dinner would be the same knife I'd kill myself with.  
  
I don't know when I exactly decided to die this way. I cradled the knife in my right hand. I brought the blade close to my left wrist. It felt cool against my skin. At that moment, I slowly glided the sharp death-maker across my wrist, allowing rivulets of blood to ooze out. The feeling wasn't what I had expected. It was..._invigorating!_ I could see my veins pulsating. They seemed to be screaming "Why? Why?!" Why, you ask? Because my life isn't worth living. When no one loves you, you can't help but not love yourself. I cut another slice, this time into my right wrist. I let the crimson liquid run down my arm like a river of tears. _But there'd be no crying here_...  
  
_Take in every last taste_. The blood tingled my taste buds as it entered my mouth. It was warm, but it gave me a sense of revitalization. Suddenly, I heard a knocking on the door. My parents never bother me at this time, I thought. "Yes?" I said, trying to sound as sweet and innocent as possible.  
  
"May we come in?" I heard my mom ask. Her voice sounded...different.  
  
"Um, I'm kind of busy with...homework. Can we talk later?" I was getting a little nervous.  
  
"No, it can't. Please let us in." Now it was my dad's voice.  
  
They don't love me, they never did! At least not the true me. If they saw who I really was, they'd want nothing to do with me. "No!" I yelled, not caring what they said. They weren't coming in, and I wasn't coming out. Enough waiting, now is the time. "Now is the time." I said outloud.  
  
"What?! Sora, open this door!" My mom screamed. I heard my parents yell other things, but I wasn't listening.  
  
"Take me to my freedom..." I tightly gripped the knife's handle. I could hear pounding on my door. I raised the knife and brought it to my neck. _It must all end here_...I could feel the blade start to penetrate my skin, my unworthy skin. Suddenly everything was a blur. It happened so fast. When I finally came to, I opened my eyes and realized where I was. I frowned. I was not dead. I was lying in a hospital bed, with wraps around my wrists and neck. "NO!!" I shouted. "N-" I cut myself short. My throat hurt but just a little.  
  
Two nurses quickly ran in. They looked at me. I just stared at them, scowling. Then they walked out and brought in my parents. My mother was crying uncontrollably, while my father wasn't looking me straight in the eyes.  
  
"Why didn't you let me die?" I said in a harsh tone. They didn't answer me. My mom just cried even louder. "I would have only been hurting myself!"  
  
"That's not true!" My dad said, finally acting alive. He and my mom sat down in the chairs opposite my bed. "Can't you see how much pain your mother is in?"  
  
I ignored his response. I sat there silently, glancing at my bandaged wrists. I shifted my gaze to the small table to my right, where a bouquet of flowers stood in a vase. Next to it was a card. "Thanks for the flowers." I said rudely. "But they won't help."  
  
"Oh, but they're not from us." My father said, continuing to do all the talking. My mother had finally stopped crying, though she was just sitting there.  
  
"Well, who are they from?" I asked. I couldn't imagine anyone who cared.  
  
"See for yourself." My dad said. He took my mom, who hadn't made eye contact with me at all, and left the room. I wanted to see who sent them. I really did. But then again, it was probably all a joke. My parents wanted me to think it was from someone else, just to make me feel better. But what if it really is from someone else? I decided to see who the sender was. After all, it wouldn't hurt to look.  
  
I lifted the card, carefully grasping it, and examined its cover. It was a picture of a beach, with a sunset reflecting off its waters. Sitting in the sand were two people. It was..._calming_. I slowly opened the card, and read its contents:  
  
_Thinking of you during the ups and downs. I hope that you will make a  
quick recovery. When you're feeling better, drop by my house.  
With love,  
Kairi  
_  
My mouth nearly dropped to the floor. _Kairi?!_ She...she actually _cared_ about me. The girl that was so far from my grasp actually wants to see me?!  
  
I don't know why, but at that moment, I realized that I had indeed locked my door. Maybe my parents had a key I never knew about. Or maybe it was a _miracle_. My life was not meant to end at that moment. Maybe tomorrow, but not today. Even though I wasn't feeling any better physically, I wanted to see Kairi. But what would I do? What would I say? What would she say? _"Oh, hi Sora. I'm a crackpot like you. Wanna kill ourselves together?"_ No, she wouldn't say that. She's too...perfect to kill herself. Too perfect to lay eyes on such a wretch like me.  
  
I slowly climbed out of bed. Good, I thought. Still wearing my own clothes, not those dirty, revealing hospital dresses. My attire consisted of blue jean shorts and a black T-shirt. The black shirt, upon close examination, still had blood on it, though it had dried up. I trudged over to the window. I hadn't even realized that it was dark out. I guess I wasn't out cold for long. Damn, Kairi will be asleep for sure by now. But how'd she find out about what happened so quickly? I guess news spread fast. I crossed my fingers, hoping that I was on the first floor. That way, I could jump out of the window and meet Kairi. If she's asleep I'll just wait by her door until morning. I looked out. Third floor. Plus the window was bolted shut. Hmph, figures they'd do that.  
  
I guess my only way out is the door. My parents will just command me to stay. They're probably afraid I'll try to do it again. _And I just might_. After all, Kairi could just be setting me up for a public humiliation. _"You're a loser! I can't believe you'd think I'd go out with a freak like you!"_ The door handle was cold, just like the knife. I shuddered at that moment, which surprised myself. I opened the door to find the hallway almost completely empty. There were a few patients walking about, and my parents were standing a little ways off, talking to a doctor. I tried to creep out as silently as possible, but when I stepped onto the tile my shoes squeaked.  
  
All three adults looked up at me and quickly rushed to my side. "Honey." My mom said, the first thing she's said to me so far. "You need to stay in bed. You can walk around in the morning if you want to, but right now you need your rest. After all, it is 11:30."  
  
11:30?! Kairi will be asleep for sure! Well, for Kairi, I'd wait an eternity. "Please, I need to see..." I trailed off. Why should I tell my parents who I was going to see? They'd probably just follow me there and babysit me.  
  
"Kairi?" My father asked, apparently remembering the name of the sender of the flowers and card.  
  
I looked down at my feet. "Yah. But I'll be fine! I just want to see her!"  
  
This time the doctor came into the conversation. "Sora, it would be better if you rested. You've...had a long day. And, we need to make sure you don't...uh, make sure you'll be okay."  
  
I glanced at my parents, both of them seemed uneasy. "Wait, you think I'm gonna hurt myself or Kairi?! I would never do that!" Sora thought for a moment then rephrased that. "I would never do that to Kairi! You believe me, right mom?"  
  
My mom quickly gazed at the ground. "Well, you see, doctors know what's best...and-"  
  
"No!" I yelled. "I can't believe this!" I needed to get out of there, and fast. The halls felt like they were starting to close on me. I pushed past the trio and ran as hard as I could.  
  
"Wait, Sora! Come back!" I heard my dad yell. I just kept on running and never looked back.

=======================================================  
  
I finally made it to Kairi's house. I knew exactly where it was, for I would walk by it everyday, hoping to spot a glimpse of Kairi. My parents will know where to find me, I thought. I guess I'll have to hide somewhere for the night and talk to Kairi tomorrow. I walked right on past her house, wishing I didn't have to leave it. I walked along the sandy beach, admiring the stars in the sky. I never really looked at them before. They've never seemed so bright.  
  
Suddenly, I heard a noise. I glance to my right and noticed a figure sitting alone on the shore. As I walked closer, the shadows revealed that it was Kairi! Kairi, awake at Midnight! I never would have guessed it. I could make out the sounds she was making. She was...crying? Well, I had wanted to talk to her, so this was my chance. "K-Kairi?" My voice made her jump as she realized I was standing there.  
  
She quickly wiped away her tears, standing up. "S-Sora! I...didn't expect you to be out of the hospital so early."  
  
"Well," I said truthfully, "I wanted to see you." Kairi looked up at me with those same beautiful eyes from the picture. Kairi glanced at my bandages. "Are you okay now?"  
  
"I'm fine." Okay, this is weird. She needs to spill it. "Kairi, you've never talked to me before or anything, so why now?"  
  
Kairi ran her fingers through her short, auburn hair. "Could we...sit down?"  
  
"Why not?" Even though I was sitting on sand and the tide was making my feet wet, I didn't even seem to care. I suddenly thought of the card she sent me. It reminded me of this moment right now: two people sitting on the beach, except the sun had set a long time ago.  
  
"Sora, well, you're unlike any other guy I've known." she said, avoiding my eyes, though I was trying desperately to look into hers.  
  
"Yah, you're right. I don't think anyone else on this island has tried to kill himself!" I joked. She didn't laugh.  
  
"Well, I-"  
  
I interrupted. "Wait, you just said you know me, but you don't know me! We've never spoken a word to each other until now!"  
  
"I know, I know!" Kairi said loudly. She grasped some sand in her hand, slowly letting each grain fall out. "I...I don't really know you, yet in a way I feel like I do. Sora, I've liked you for a very long time."  
  
My eyes grew wide with surprise, relief, and fear. "You? You like me? But I thought-"  
  
"I was too nervous to say anything." There was silence for a while.  
  
_I cannot believe this is happening! Surely I must be dead, for this can't be real!_ "Kairi, I was nervous, too. I figured that you were too good for me. That you could never like me, even though I was-am in love with you."  
  
For the first time that night, Kairi stared intently into my eyes. "I-I was so upset when I heard what had happened. I thought that I would never get a chance to tell you how I felt, until now."  
  
I sighed. "Well, I'm sure you don't feel that way anymore. Yah, you really have a crush on a suicidal maniac!"  
  
"Well, when you put it that way..." Kairi trailed off then giggled. "No, but seriously, all the more reason that you need me."  
  
My voice softened to a whisper. "I need you..." Instead of later this evening when that moment was fast, this one seemed in slow motion. I found myself leaning in toward Kairi. I expected her to back away..._but she didn't_. I took one look at her rosy lips, and kissed them. My hand wrapped around her waist, her arm sliding around my neck. It was the best moment of my life. Suddenly, the invigoration I felt from cutting myself felt like nothing. Finally I released her, though I didn't want to.  
  
Death! Just a little while ago I was thinking about death! And I would have been missing out on..._her_. Kairi looked up at me, and smiled. That smile. And it was directed at me!  
  
"Just know, Sora, that I'm always here for you. You have so much of you life ahead of you. Don't waste it all away." Kairi said, crystal liquid forming in her eyes.  
  
"Don't cry. I'm gonna be okay. You...you made me realize that I am loved, that I am cared about!" I wiped away her few tears. "Remember, there'll be no crying here."  
  
I hadn't realized it at first, but in a single night I had been so close to _death_, the closest I've been to _dying_, yet at that moment, I'd never felt so _alive_.  
  
_The thought of me never having you, I couldn't deal with that, so I cried. I figured that I should end my life, drowning in my own crimson tide. But because of you I was brought back before I even died. In the end our love was revealed, no longer can it hide. __  
_  
==**Kairi's POV**==  
  
_Because of me your life isn't coming to an end._  
_The Legend says I'll save you once again._

_===========================================_

Well, what do you think? It's my first one-shot, so be nice! Oh yes, and for those of you who don't know, one-shots are only a one time thing, it's not a regular fic, hence its name 'one-shot'. Anyways, thank you so much for reading! Since you went through this whole thing, why not review?!


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